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I still find it troubling the amount of denial people inflict upon themselves just to be with someone else. I am cautious of anyone who compromises who they truly are in order to be with someone. Okay, not just somone…anyone! You know them, the people who are in unhealthy relationships because of fear of being alone with themselves. And, I am doubly-troubled by people who asks for their ideal mate, find them and then immediately run in the opposite direction because they aren’t feeling “ready” for it.
I don’t know if this is a silent epidemic or what? But, there are so many people right now settling in relationships because they either: a. Cannot be alone, or b. Do not think they are worthy of the person they thought only existed in their dreams. Let me ask you something, when exactly is it okay for you to be happy people? What are you waiting for? For it to be too late? For someone to come and get you? For the perfect job? The perfect living situation? One more promotions, a college degree or something silly like that? And, while you create all these imaginary obstacles between you and your happiness–Mr. or Ms. Right is going about their lives, because they got tired of waiting for you to embrace what you think you’re working for, but, already have.
Life in all its aspects is always trying to help move us along our paths. And, our relationships whether they be work, friendship, sports, or romantic are there to help us grow. Chances are your friends, or romantic partner have aspects that you’re missing and vice versa. Thus we find ourselves attracted. When we spend time with these outside aspects, we are in fact learning by example or osmosis as it were. I’ve come to realize that example is truly how we learn things, not being told what to do. As people don’t really like that. And, if you truly want to further your life experience, and expand yourself as individual, you cannot choose to be fearful of getting exactly what you wished for.
If your dream as a dude was a smart, hot, intelligent chick, who laughs at all your stupid jokes and you meet her… Dude, run toward, not away from the woman! Sure, you’re not perfect, you’re not ready, but, the question is are you willing? See…that’s what really counts. Are you willing to grow with this person? If your dream as a chick is a dude, who’s smart, caring, thoughtful, and who doesn’t mind shoe shopping with you and you meet him… Um…hello, do not try an overhaul the man, but, appreciate the good things that much more, and discuss the toliet-seat issue, or heck, just deal with it! And, hey–if you’re a chick into chicks, or a dude into dude…the same theory applies to you (I have love for everyone!).
A sometimes-wise poet I know encourages people to “Hug bones while their still warm”. I call him sometimes-wise, because, obviously he is correct in his point, even if he, himself doesn’t always live by his own wisdom. 😉 But, like this man, there is hope for us all, and a choice to not only have whatever you wish, but, embrace it, because you deserve it. Why? Because you are…and that’s more than enough of a reason.
Love Peace Happiness N One,
SunDeevah