I know that some people would prefer I’d feel obligated to make sure they are happy. I know that some people really hate it when I say my responsibility is to my own spirit first. I know… I just no longer care.
Last night, I watched The Matrix Reloaded for the first time in a while. And, while I really do not like Keanu Reeves as an actor, I really dig the concept of the movie. If this current world we live in is the Matrix… then you can find the real me, in Zion… this body on this plane is an illusion! I am not one of you docile people walking around in a fog thinking that there’s no way out of this place. I am not going to do what I’m told as if I do not know I have a choice to do otherwise.
I’ve always been an abnormal person, headstrong, opinonanted, and possbily one of the world’s worst followers. And, I used to think that those feelings were wrong. But, everytime I’d try to be one of those “clone-like” beings, I’d find out first-hand, how fake, empty, and utterly lonely they are. Real-life Artificial Intelligence! It has always, always, ALWAYS made me sick! In my highschool, I was voted… “Most Argumentative”! LOL… I wear that proudly now. I realize that my opinions are a huge part of what makes me interesting, if one would call me such. And, that I really do prefer to carve paths rather than walk them. If there’s two paths one is well-paved, time efficient and well-worn. And, then there’s another one that’s a bit rocky, goes over a mountain, and was never paved… Come on, do I need to actually tell you which one I’m taking?! Obviously, people don’t appreciate the views from a mountaintop as much as I! LOL
My mom used to say things like I should be “nice.” I utterely HATE that word! Nice is a bullshit concept! I had Gene look up the word nice once, and the first word that was in the definition was, “Agreeable”! WTF?!!!! Nice is what we do to manipulate one another. We’re nice to get things out of people, while secretly hating them and ourselves for being such! We are quick to blame other’s for us getting burned for being “nice”. Ah…NO! If you were “nice” in a situation where you should’ve been honest and got burned. It’s no one’s fault but YOURS! Choices manifest consequences. And, whether you want to embrace that simple science, doesn’t keep the equation from happening. So… get over yourselves! Me?! I’m not nice! Nope, won’t even lie to you. I am NOT agreeable! I’m honest. If I want to do whatever it is I’m being asked, I will. If not, I won’t. And, the choice is based on what my souls says works for her. She, I don’t go against, not for ANYONE! By the way, it doesn’t make you a martyr to sell yourself out for someone else’s happiness. It makes you stupid! I’m sure we’ve all had enough situations to let us know that I may have a point with that theory. Going against yourself is clearly some sort of self-destructive, slightly suicidal behavior. If you really care enough about yourself, you’ll investigate it, and heal it. If not, you’ll continue to blame other people for your behavior, and your unhappiness!
Remember in The Matrix Reloaded that Monica Bellucci’s character used a kiss to blackmail Neo and the crew to get “The Keymaker”? That’s a huge point regarding love, no?! Some people have a Matrix type of love. It’s programed to be real, but… IT AIN’T! The kisses are meaningless, the touches leave you annoyed rather than aroused. And, you find all sorts of colorful ways to keep The Matrix fake love going! All that poor, rich little woman in the movie wanted was to remember what it felt like to feel physical love! Wow! Amazing! Did you know that like 20% of married couples are having sex fewer that 10 times a year?! OMG! Hmm…wonder why? Oh…the Matrix, the matrix, the matrix of it all! And, recently ABC News has asked if America is addicted to porn?! Um…yikes?! BTW…I am not against porn, you didn’t ask, but, I just need to say that it’s no substitute for the real thing! There is no substitute for LOVE, um…the Zion version(?). LOL…
So, nope…I’m not going back into The Matrix, no matter what kinda of guilt, emotional blackmail, anger, blame or whatever weapon is thrown at me. Simply put… you guys aren’t worth it! Don’t get me wrong, I love all people as I love myself, but, I honor and respect choice. If you’d like to stay in the system (insert a type here), I honor that choice, but, I will not be converted. If that separates us… SO BE IT. I will have compassion for anyone who refuses to wake up and smell the coffee, or unplug from The Matrix, but…I’m not coming to save you. That’s your job! And, if you cannot do it, it cannot and will not be done. What I say goes, and what YOU say goes too!
Love Peace Happiness N One,
SunDeevah