Dude… what a day. Like most days, it started well. I woke up happy, and even made some muffins for breakfast before work. I had time to do my make up, watch tv, make coffee, feed the cats… Yep. A swell day. And, then… it happened!
There I was sitting at my desk, it was still fairly early. I sensed it coming, I did. But, I thought my coffee had it covered. NOPE. No deal. So, I had another cup of coffee… Surly, this would do it. But, no…it didn’t. I had left a very important part of myself at home. I’m not sure what section of the brain it is, but, it’s the part that makes you feel like you’re present in your body. And, I had most certainly left it home for the better part of the day. On most days working in an office, I feel present around… 12 noon. Today, around noon, I was just annoyed, frustrated and slightly pissed. Why? Well, I could go into great detail about it, but, the short answer is: I realized, I was physically awake, when  I should’ve still been physically asleep!
Although, I’m a coffee fan, I am not an addict. Which is a blessing, as I was desperate to stay awake. I was also able to maintain enough self-control to not do the following: 1. Eat people’s heads off for breathing near me. 2. Not bounce off the walls of the entire floor, just to see if I could. 3. Not jump out of the window because it was too stuffy inside–I mean, I believe I can fly, don’t you? LOL. Kidding… just kidding.
Anyway, as my best friend Clarissa will tell you my sleepiness is quite the adventure. It starts of simply enough. First thing that happens is, the whining… Yes, I occassionally whine, and fatigue is usually involved when that happens. And, then… PUNCHY. EVERYTHING is funny! Today’s highlight was watching two of my bosses trying desperately to open a wireless mouse out of the plastic it gets packed in. They were in the office, and I watched through the mostly frosted window laughing my ass off at them. I admit it, I was loud, my laugh was obnoxious! But…they like me for that very reason. Apparently, lawyers don’t smile and giggle on the regular. As if that weren’t enough, it took two of them to figure out it wasn’t working because the batteries were in wrong! LMAO!!! YES…I laughed even harder and louder. And, I thanked them for the comedy. They said I was welcomed, and that there would be more improve latter. I asked if it could involve a lightbulb! Ba-dump bump! LOL
The third and most terrible phase of me being sleepy is the ANGRY stage. Now…I’m just pissed that I’m awake. I get fidgety, my eyes can’t focus, and my body literally starts hurting in random places. Every part of me is screaming SHUT DOWN! And, I’m saying, “What?! You want me to climb under my desk?!” It’s quite the show, I’m surfing the internet, I’m writing poetry, I’m singing in my head, I’m making random phone calls to my work-friends, saying, “Help me! I’m sleepy!” I’m eating a lot of fruit, drinking water…moving into the ladies room because of too much water intake!” I try deep breathing, yeah, no good, I want to sleep. I’m chanting in OM in my head…I think it translates into a higher form of sleep (it doesn’t really but…that’s how it feels), rock music??? Nope, even Korn starts sounding like a lullaby.
As a last restort to staying awake I go take a walk outside. I almost never do this. I don’t take lunches, I always eat at my desk, as it’s highly likely that if I do leave it, I’m not coming back. Outside was a good call. The sun was bright today, the air was a bit breezy, and I had my MP3 player, to create some intimacy between me and me. I walked around for about 1/2 hour, grabbed a beef patty from Golden Krust–I love them, its been years since I had one. And, I sipped on lemonade. So…by the time I got back to my office, I felt…semi-awake. At least, my body wasn’t fighting with me anymore. By the time I finally felt like I’d gotten all of myself to work, it was 3pm. I’m done at 4:30pm!!!! LMAO!
The moral of the story is… I gotta eventually work for myself, as my sleep schedule is kooky! Never underestimate the power of the elements, and our need for them. And…lemonade goes with just about anything–especially if you’re Southern! The good news is: I didn’t bite anyone today (Wait??? That is good news, right?! LOL), I only bounced on the walls on the inside, and even though I’m still convinced I can fly, I didn’t jump out any windows!
See…it really can be quite the challenge sometimes, but…I thrive on those. Ha ha!
Love Peace Happiness N One,

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