I have to admit, I’m troubled by the continuing downward trend when it comes to honor. When did it become acceptable to not be a person of your word? When did it become okay, to expect people to not do what they say they will. And, why are we tolerating this?!
I think about the tribal communities, I think about times gone by and the societies that went with them. And, while I don’t necessarily believe in group mentality. I do believe in honoring “the tribe”, by being a person of honor. When I use the word “tribe”, I mean that on a global term. But, it was an incident today that made me realize, something has gone horribly wrong.
Once upon a time, when a person gave their word to do something, they actually meant it and we believed them. Whether it be your parent, your spouse, your friend, or, heck…the local retail sales person. But, nowadays, we’ve all gotten used to waiting for the other shoe to drop when dealing with others. Why? Because at some point in time, we gave our word, but, out actions didn’t meet those standards set. And, at first, when that Starbucks employee tells you to bag your own items, you think–no, they must be crazy, so, you politely ask, “Wait, you’re asking me to do your job for you?!” Or, the second time, when, your server at the local restaurant is nasty, you feel like you’re imposing on their day. Or, when you offer someone a substantial sum of money to fix your car, your computer, your laundry, your… and, they don’t bother to return your calls, your emails, your text messages, your facebook comments… You ask yourself, “what the hell is wrong with people?” And, yet, when the tables are turned, people act shocked when no one wants to honor words given to them.
Did it start at home when you asked your mom for that special birthday gift, and she didn’t come through? Did is start when your best friend promised not to like the same boy/girl that you did, and you find out they started dating them shortly thereafter? Or, the person who told the secret they swore not to tell? Was it when you casted your first vote for a politician who swore before millions that their agenda was in alignment with your needs, and then did an about-face once in office? I don’t know… I honestly don’t know. But, I’m certain…we’re in trouble.
Call me an idealist, but, when someone tells me they will do something, I believe them. I’m the type of person who does what I say I will do, and if I cannot do it, I say that I cannot. Sure, we could argue that we don’t want to be the following: 1. impolite. 2. rude. 3. mean. 4. ungrateful and, a whole bunch of other things. But, which looks better? Telling the truth and maintaining honor. Or, knowingly lie and looking like a dandruff flake that cannot be counted on? But, here’s the better question, which would you prefer to be on the receiving end of?
Today, when someone I spent a lot of time talking to for the past month, didn’t come through for me, I had to report them to their superiors. Does it make me mean? No, there was money at stake. Am I being rude? No, I’m the customer. Am I being ungrateful? Well, no, the services I requested were never implemented. So…I don’t feel bad in the slightest. I don’t know if this person will either be reprimanded for their obvious, willful screw-up, or fired. But, either way, their lack of honor in neither providing service, nor being honest in that they could not provide service, set into motion a sad ending for themselves. That’s the lesson, in my opinion.
The old adage states that if you “stand for nothing, you’ll fall for anything.” If you behave in a dishonorable way, then you cannot expect people to treat you with honor. Honor is earned by acting with it. The people in our lives that we admire and respect, have probably consistently acted with honor, and therefore we continue to look up to them for being the example. My concern is that the honorable woman and man are becoming endangered. And, that we are only being left with their self-involved, selfish and self-centered counterparts. If that is so, the tribe itself is becoming endangered. The sad part is, correcting this problem isn’t rocket science, but, a choice. It isn’t an expensive choice. Congress need not meet on it, nor the U.N. And, no G8 summit will be necessary. We simply need to take this now moment and say, “I’m going to be the person I’d like to admire.” And, then, honor it.
Love Peace Happiness N One,
Monica
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