Peace to all my peeps and readers… Hope you had a blessed Holiday. And, Happy Kwanza to all those celebrating!
I’m back from NC, completed with sniffles! Aaaaachhhooo! Heehee. Regardless, home was great! A quick shout out to Claire, Delina and Jennifer, I had such a great time with you on Saturday! Just goes to show you, a friendship made well, is a friendship made for life! It’s so nice to hang with people who know me so well, no explaination is necessary. It’s refreshing.
The family visit was good too. Due to some travel complications on the way out, I had an overnight layover in DC, so, I saw family there too. My family? For me, they put the “fun” in dysfunctional, and as long as I keep my hands off their lives and let the petty stuff go…well, where they take their lives is where they choose. And, that leads me to today’s blog–hands off and letting go.
It’s close to New Year’s kids and some of you will be doing that resolution thing. I, don’t do them–not for New Year’s at least. I’m resolved about things whenever I need to be. And, as each moment passes, I’ve become more resolved in becoming a better version of myself. I’m allowing new energies to help me grow and change. And, you know what? Change isn’t always good for those you keep around you. A friendship that worked yesterday, maybe hazardous to the change you’re in the midst of making for a better you tomorrow. And, though it makes me uncomfortable, some people and friendships I’ve gotta let go of.
It could be argued that I’m a perpetual optimist. It could be said, that I’m a drill sergeant in the army of self-fullfilment, and I would not argue. But, I’m also of a fan of if the horse has been lead to water, yet doesn’t want to drink–let it die of thirst. See, that drill sergeant thing it has a light and dark side. I’m versed in both. There are certain relationships that I’ve had for sometime, that I will not be keeping. As they aren’t serving me in the sense of growth. And, while some may think that growth is an option, I know it isn’t–it’s inevitable, the question is, are you going to go with it? Or, try an fight it? And, well, there’s other fights to fight and this one is pointless.
I am a caretaker…yes, I’m aware. I take care of people in many ways. I’m the first person there with the encouraging words to inspire, or the tools for you to get yourself together or whatever… I’m a 24/7/365 cheerleader for quite a few people. Why? Because, I truly believe we can have whatever we want out of life, if we’re willing to go after it fearlessly, or in the face of fear, use courage to go after it anyway. And, while I will always believe that, I also have to accept–not everyone is going to find the promised land within. A lot of people will fall short of themselves, or choose to be safe (as if there was such a thing!) than passionate about life. Some will become one-hit wonders, only doing what their good at, and avoiding at all cost what they suck at. And, while everyone is telling them how great they are (at something so easy it’s second-nature), there’s that other side unnurtured, underdeveloped that causes inner earthquakes, because no one is feeding it, loving it, or allowing it to see light. And, that person, might as well walk with a limp, because they aren’t running on both legs–but, one.
Honestly, I cannot tell you how many times I’ve seen this in people lately, more than I care to think about, and it makes me sad everytime. But, knowing that my life is what I make it, I know that I want to keep going. And, knowing that also implies that I know that I’ll outgrow a lot of people I love–there’s a reason why it’s called “the road less traveled.” I realize that my solo hike was a physical example of what we do now. Mind you, the people who I’m referring to know that my time with them is either over, or very close. I always come with warning labels, but, more than that, who I am is blindingly apparent, so apparent that some would wish that I didn’t say what I was thinking all the time. Ahhh…yeah… that’ll never happen! LOL
I’m getting better everyday, and I like myself and my life more and more with each passing day. The ones who stay have been here for years–the ones who fall away…hope they got what they needed. The ones who walked away–ugh…well…I wish you courage to look in the mirror and acknowledge the being staring back at you.
Love Peace Happiness N One,
SunDeevah (all the time, everywhere!)