I’m considering making the Lilypad a safehouse, okay so, it already is…for me. But, I’m thinking about making it official. I know you all don’t know this, but, dude…mercury is about to go retrograde. Now, before you all get twisted with the “opinons” on astrology, I’d like to point out that it is the oldest science. And, for the good folk who subscribe to the holy bible, its one of the first things mentioned in the book of Genesis. Anyway, what does it mean when mercury goes into retrograde? Well, it means difficulty with communication, transportation, transmission, technology…etc. Mercury is the messenger planet, so, think about is this way…things will run amuck and take longer to get done. The only way to cope is to go with it. My advice, just when you’re ready to pull your hair out, or rip off the ears of the person who can’t seem to get your directions right… BREATHE! And, breathe again, like… two more times. Those of you in the city, this means, the subway will be problematic, so, don’t forget that i-pod, book, or soduku puzzle, because it may take an extra minute to get to work.
So, last weekend was the Chili and Wine bday party, this weekend, the “Oh my Goddess!” party. Stay tuned for the pictures, this is a very tight circle, as some of the Goddesses are living in other lands, read: Atlanta and J’ville. Holla! –and won’t be able to make it physically, but, in spirit, they’ll be drinking wine with the rest of us. –Anyway, I’m very excited to have a girls’ night at the lilypad to celebrate the feminine and my birthday..(yes!) again.
As of late, I’ve been navigating the unknown in some of my relationships. And, well, I’m about to do something that I rarely do, be silent. Now, here’s the thing, when I talk, I really do my best to utilize words and emotions that will penetrate the armor of the listener and swim to the heart of the matter. Honestly, I’m an excellent listener. And, problem-solving is also something I do, assuming you want the problem solved. That brings me to my point. After years and years of listening and attempting to advise some near and dears, I’ve come to the conclusion that some people would rather have problems, drama and issues. And, while I do not have a say in how people conduct themselves in their everyday lives, I do have a say as to if I’m going to participate. And, you know what? I decline.
You know, I just turned 33, and I was telling my nephew the other night that in some ways, I feel like I’ve already mothered a few people. And, now…now… I really just want to focus on me. People will do what they want, knowing that it isn’t what’s best for them, or that it won’t turn out well. What did they say the definition of insanity was? Oh…right…doing the same thing over again expecting different results. Yeah, well…I’m all out dude… When I apply myself to someone as friend, business partner,  lover, sibling, aunt, daughter, etc… I really do give my best–everytime; even if my best varies from day to day. In the past, I would demand it back, now…I don’t care. I mean, if you want to half-ass your relationship with me, you can keep all of it. I’m not hurting over here, you know what I mean? My profile alone speaks to the amazing relationships I’ve built over the years, so…yeah…enough with the B.S.
Truth be told, people really hate it when I’m silent. It freaks them out. And, well, I’ll be honest, one of three things are happening when I’m silent. 1. I’m really livid, like rabid dog, livid. Or, 2. I’m over it! And, when I’m over it its because I’ve exhausted everything. 3. I’m contemplating my next move, and in counsel on the inside of myself.
Now, of course I could say that I’m choosing to be silent with some people because life is short and I don’t need it, but, that wouldn’t be true. The truth is, life is a series of many moments, and I want the majority of mine to be filled with what I want to do, people I want to be with, and being the person I’ve always wanted. Surrounding yourself with people with issues, drama, problems, and those inclined to chase their tail isn’t going to get you far in the pursuit of your own happiness. So, someone has to go, and it won’t ever be me. I think something has happened to me, and its either that I’m finally becoming laid back (Stop it! I have my own version), or, I’m just getting tired, or…could it be, I’m becoming a more refined version of myself. Hmm…all three? Heehee…
In any case, for all of my loves that I’ve repeated myself to over the years… I’m almost done. I hope you took notes, because I’m almost finished here. There will be a test, it just won’t be givien by me, but, your life. Try to go with it, and not get your ass kicked into submission. Either way…learn something. 😉
Love Peace Happiness N One,
SunDeevah
 

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